Anthony Swarzak, Cheer Up!!!

Living in Ohio, the only time I got to see the Twins play (in person or live) was when they played the Indians. This year everything changed when I purchased the MLB.tv package. Now I can now watch every game. I get to watch Mauer’s professional at bats… Pavano’s stache in high definition…. the cheerful ramblings of Bert…. and of course our wonderful pitching staff. 

One thing that bothers me whenever I watch, is how sad Anthony Swarzak looks whenever he’s pitching or on camera… Because of this, I have put together a list of things that could make Anthony Swarzak happy (other than being traded to a contending team):

1. A Unicorn Jumping Over a Rainbow 

2. ALF – Hey, it was very popular in the 80’s. For the Sabermetric folks, ALF topped out as the #10 watched show in 1987/1988

3. Pie – It’s far superior to cake… you’ll never find a birthday party that served pie with leftovers (you will with cake). 

4. Puppies

5. The fact that he’s making $487,000 this year….

Smile Anthony, you’re making watching the Twins harder than it already is.

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